This blog is mostly for me, so I can let out all the things I am keeping in, but, if my friends and family read it, maybe they will know the things that I am just not so good at letting out. I'm pretty outgoing, but when I think about it, there is so much in my day to day life, good and bad, that I just, keep inside. But that's not healthy, and even if I am the only one to read this, it will be good for me.
I realize that I am going to have a great bit of time on my hands over the next few weeks, and will need something to do with myself while I am, well, unable to do much else. I am the kind of person who prefers several irons in the fire, but, I guess life is going to be slowing me down. In a lot of ways, I am pretty worried about it. How will Mark possibly be able to do all this? Will Savanah understand why she can't cuddle with me (which happens so rarely, but is such a treat when she does...)? What about my puppy? How will he feel laying next to me, unable to really visit with me for a little bit for fear that his big old feet will be used as weapons.
Then of course, I have my thoughts on doing this surgery. The risks are very minor, only two risks really. Am I selfish for wanting this? Is it fair for my family to even have to deal with me out of commission for a few weeks for something that might not work. Am I crazy for wanting this so bad? Will this actually make the pain go away???
But then maybe, just maybe, it will work. Maybe we will get what we have been wanting for so long. I just don't know if I can continue to handle the massive disappointment month after month.
Info on the surgery can be found here : Ovarian Wedge Resection
No comments:
Post a Comment